I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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