You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We are two peas in an std pod
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
