1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
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