Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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