He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
