just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
My vagina is officially offended.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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