Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
