I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
