tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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