Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
you didnt know i had herpes?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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