I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
