the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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