i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
As shirtless as possible
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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