its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
