the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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