Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
someone owes me an orgasm
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
