I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
