butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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