Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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