I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
