hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
