no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
