Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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