theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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