some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
