it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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