question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
