I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
