Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
My breasts were aching with rage.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
