My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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