Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
