I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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