JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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