I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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