Your tits are I can't wait for
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
