You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
