I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize