I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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