youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
