Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
