i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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