It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Your penis caused this!
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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