Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize