Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
