I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
