Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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