i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize