Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
