Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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