Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
